As the weather gets colder and crazier, I start getting a little stir-crazy. In November, I have my darkest times... when the snow hits, I just have trouble accepting things--- the legs don't work like they should, the cold makes me a little sick, and while I have an urge to run, as I like to do if I'm going a little nutty and don't know what to say to people, having to catch myself when I slip on ice, while all my heart, despite my pain, wants to either move or tear my damn hair out.
I have to accept certain things-
My legs are fucked up right now. I am anxious as all hell. I don't know who, how or what to say to people. People are hurting and damn it, I can't help them, and it hurts! I love snow, actually- ya kind of have to around here! But I hate the feeling of being buried or held back, and it's hard not to feel that right now. I am attempting to find numerous distractions, while also letting others heal, not loading my issues on them. So I wrote it out. Now I feel a bit better.