I blog gluten-free

Friday, December 31, 2010

Counting Blessings After the Chaos/ Happy 2011

2010 was crazy. We saw Grandma go down hill quickly, after a short remission from lymphatic cancer. Her occasional confusion became full blown Alzheimers.
In August, she went in her sleep. Now for the will to get done so people stop attacking each other, it drives me nuts!
This and other issues have been on my mind of late... I think this will be the year of relearning trust and bringing my self made family closer.
We've had joys too... Many!
Connor got into a better school... he's been there a week and is a little scared, but has made 4 new friends already! With his silly, sparkly personality, he's sure to make more!
Me, I've been fighting with my legs. The pain, and not wanting to be arm candy, especially for a guy who I thought of as a friend, treats me like a child "Hey, kid"?- and thinks it's funny that I have small hands and my head  can be used as a rest for his arm- kept me from going to a party as live doll. In a way I'm grateful. Talked to another sister of mine, they're doing ok, just pining for Florida, boyfriend has to have surgery on coccyx, etc. But they enjoy their new dog from a shelter, so I'm thrilled for them. Little victories. Little Victories was the theme of 2010.
New place, out of Chautauqua County, and closer to things. Episcopal Mass was marvelous and I felt blessed that they worked with the Celiac community and that it is not religion, but faith that was tantamount. Marvelous people... new friends, old friends... I'm so happy we can all get comfortable and blend. I'm still healthier than I've ever been... it's true! So, 2011 is coming. We had the Chaotic Trifecta, '08-'10. Let's see what '11 offers!
Oh, and I got a pet. A bunny unofficially called Simon who walks with me, sits on me when I'm outside, and follows me to McDonalds in hopes that he can find french fries. He's a nice, quiet friendly bugger, and I like walking with him here and there. As odd as a girl and bunny might look walking!

2010 Closes With the Day Of the Boobs

I'm OK... I can still type, if not speak entirely coherently. I am currently praying my Excedrine holds out... and that I don't sleep through my wash load!
I was grateful for a chicken soup delivery, gluten free, with a few jalopeno bits... (No, not HOT... but it definitely kicks butt). The same person kind of wanted a pretty little sexy doll as arm candy at a Recovery Mixer. As alcohol is not an issue for me, and because I feel pain, I attempted to make it clear... it's old TV night again. And I want to drink a bit. I'm walking a bit drunk now, and feel showing up @ AA in that state, them not knowing my issues, would be a bad idea! Plus, while I want to help the Haps out as much as possible, sorry, dude, yet again you fall into "Nice Guy, BUT" territory. "BUT" being, I see you as a friend, you treat me like you would a sister (Call me "kid", one more time, I dare ya!) and you DATED MY SISTER 10 YEARS AGO! Awkward, much? When I told her about perhaps modelling for Hapsburg T-shirts, she asked dryly, "Wet or dry?"
All's not bad. Went to Victoria's Secret at last, and got a true fitting. I didn't know I was a size small! And discovered I've done a lot of shrinking in many departments. (I kind of figured that.)
So, small steps! I have properly fitted foundations now :) It's a start.
I got mad enough to do a lot of things in frustration. Because it's been brewing. I already lost to food this week. And I had an anniversary of a bad event 7 months ago on Christmas...so I'm really not myself.
I can has rant? I should be delighted... honored that I've been invited to the big Addiction Recovery Mixer. But... a friend, or I thought, wants a girl on his arm... I'd be thrilled with skirts, and heels, if I didn't have scoliosis or nerve pain and a tendency to waver right now, like I'm uh... drunk. I hurt, the nice weather is causing pressure on me, fuck it, I'm not arm candy, this guy is a friend, yes, but someone I thought of as merely that, or a business thing, what with helping out the T-Shirt company. I don't feel pretty, because I feel I have to dress big to cover my skeletal defects and the way my back curves. And I wanna sit on my ass, drink, and watch Lucy. Happy New Year to me.
 I was tired and out of it too... and hurting... I don't like "damp"... he said the old "Once an addict always an addict", I'm afraid I tossed "Once a drunk always a drunk" at him. I also called him a boob. I think he took it well, he thanked me.
You boob, it wasn't a compliment... I WAS MAD! 

30 Days, 1 Million Lessons Learned, Part 2

The project was, as follows:
Day1: A picture of yourself with fifteen facts
Day 2: A picture of you and the person you have been closest with the longest
Day 3: A picture of the cast from your favorite show
Day 4: A picture of something you'd like to do again
Day 5: A picture of something you love
Day 6: A picture that makes you laugh
Day 7: A picture of the person you do the most messed up things with
Day 8: A picture of your night
Day 9: A picture of the person who has gotten you through the most
Day 10: A picture of your most treasured item
Day 11: A picture of something you hate
Day 12: A picture of your favorite memory
Day 13: A picture of your favorite band or artist
Day 14: A picture of someone you could never imagine your life without
Day 15: A picture of something you want to do before you die
Day 16: A picture of someone who inspires you
Day 17: A picture of something that has made a huge impact on your life recently
Day 18: A picture of your biggest insecurity
Day 19: A picture and a letter
Day 20: A picture of somewhere you'd love to travel
Day 21: A picture of something you wish you could forget
Day 22: A picture of something you wish you were better at
Day 23: A picture of your favorite book
Day 24: A picture of something you wish you could change
Day 25: A picture of your Day
Day 26: A picture of something that means a lot to you
Day 27: A picture of yourself and a family member
Day 28: A picture of something you're afraid of
Day 29: A picture that can always make you smile
Day 30: A picture of someone you miss

1) I LOVE coffee. 2)I'm a psych major 3) I've always wanted to know how people work. (4 I can be friends with just about anyone. 5) I'd date a hunchback if he had honor and integrity. 6)When people tell me I'm pretty, I admit, I get flustered! I really am that thankful 7)I'm brutal in my honesty sometimes. 8)I'm sarcastic as all get out. 9)I once did some boxing. I'm a featherweight. 10)I'm full of silly. 11)I love Monty Python movies. 12) Bubbles was a nickname bestowed by the Angel of Mischief, now chasing cherubim around and being loud in heaven! 13)Looking at pics of Grandma in her teenage years, I look just like her. 14)I can't tan. The rest of my family can. 15) I am really clumsy

you can't love THINGS. But, books & Beth = match made in heaven

Sure, it's a hodge podge... or so it seems. Each attempts to answer a question.

30 Days, 33 Pics, 1 Million Plus Memories and Lessons.

Well, I completed my 30 Day Photo Project, nailed down a lot, found out just how marvelous Google Images is when I'm stuck! And taught myself that the pain will ease, and I'll get my head out of my butt somehow.
The whole album is HERE. These are among my favorites.

Shirt and slippers matching is purely coincidental! That is a tin lunchbox set of Lucy DVDs. :)

I'll attempt to blog more than these, and intergrate word and text as I mean to. In the mean time, this New Year, I will welcome 2011, cold and all, with humidifier pumping. I will accept help if offered, and I will, I swear, remember:
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change
Courage to change the things I can
And the wisdom to know the difference. Amen.
And now, Fuzzy Slipper and Lucy Time :)