I was grateful for a chicken soup delivery, gluten free, with a few jalopeno bits... (No, not HOT... but it definitely kicks butt). The same person kind of wanted a pretty little sexy doll as arm candy at a Recovery Mixer. As alcohol is not an issue for me, and because I feel pain, I attempted to make it clear... it's old TV night again. And I want to drink a bit. I'm walking a bit drunk now, and feel showing up @ AA in that state, them not knowing my issues, would be a bad idea! Plus, while I want to help the Haps out as much as possible, sorry, dude, yet again you fall into "Nice Guy, BUT" territory. "BUT" being, I see you as a friend, you treat me like you would a sister (Call me "kid", one more time, I dare ya!) and you DATED MY SISTER 10 YEARS AGO! Awkward, much? When I told her about perhaps modelling for Hapsburg T-shirts, she asked dryly, "Wet or dry?"
All's not bad. Went to Victoria's Secret at last, and got a true fitting. I didn't know I was a size small! And discovered I've done a lot of shrinking in many departments. (I kind of figured that.)
So, small steps! I have properly fitted foundations now :) It's a start.
I got mad enough to do a lot of things in frustration. Because it's been brewing. I already lost to food this week. And I had an anniversary of a bad event 7 months ago on Christmas...so I'm really not myself.
I can has rant? I should be delighted... honored that I've been invited to the big Addiction Recovery Mixer. But... a friend, or I thought, wants a girl on his arm... I'd be thrilled with skirts, and heels, if I didn't have scoliosis or nerve pain and a tendency to waver right now, like I'm uh... drunk. I hurt, the nice weather is causing pressure on me, fuck it, I'm not arm candy, this guy is a friend, yes, but someone I thought of as merely that, or a business thing, what with helping out the T-Shirt company. I don't feel pretty, because I feel I have to dress big to cover my skeletal defects and the way my back curves. And I wanna sit on my ass, drink, and watch Lucy. Happy New Year to me.
I was tired and out of it too... and hurting... I don't like "damp"... he said the old "Once an addict always an addict", I'm afraid I tossed "Once a drunk always a drunk" at him. I also called him a boob. I think he took it well, he thanked me.
You boob, it wasn't a compliment... I WAS MAD!
I was tired and out of it too... and hurting... I don't like "damp"... he said the old "Once an addict always an addict", I'm afraid I tossed "Once a drunk always a drunk" at him. I also called him a boob. I think he took it well, he thanked me.
You boob, it wasn't a compliment... I WAS MAD!
Well, you might not be arm candy, but you are sweet! I understand the pain. Unless you've been through it, you can't understand. Depression and pain meds were my addiction - that makes for a New Year's Eve with Lucy sound perfect. You go girl and make yourself first. Happy New Year, Baby!
ReplyDeleteHappy New Year, Melanie. Yup, I'm taking time off... got to do my thing, or else I can't be help for anyone, including me. I'll party sometime, get the "Yucks" out first!
ReplyDeleteWell, you might not be arm candy, but you are sweet! I understand the pain. Unless you've been through it, you can't understand. Depression and pain meds were my addiction - that makes for a New Year's Eve with Lucy sound perfect. You go girl and make yourself first. Happy New Year, Baby!
ReplyDelete