I blog gluten-free

Saturday, August 13, 2011

No, Really...Trust Me!

There is a sick affliction among those whose curiosity runs to infinity.
The phrase "Trust me, don't google that, whatever you do" sounds like "No running" to a puppy or a toddler. That is, we read or hear "Google" and "run" and the curious side takes over. Or we choose to take it as an order. "Challenge accepted!" -"Oh, God, no. No, no, no..."

Nobody, for God's sake, nobody--- needs to see surgical procedure photos. Believe me--- I went, out of curiosity (Medical curiosity is part of life) after seeing an old friend's post on laproscopic knee surgery--- I found that "Laproscopic k" gave me a result for a form of kidney surgery I am thrilled not to have gone under. I will love and be proud of the thick scar that runs halfway around me. Basically giving birth to a kidney is not something I'd like to undergo. (As for males, the "scar less" kidney surgery may be infinitely worse. Please, on all that is holy, right, true, and good, I beg of you, sisters and brethren, DO NOT GOOGLE FOR THE SCAR LESS VERSION OF KIDNEY SURGERY. 
This is not my newest scare... I handled, with some success, bizarre forms of sexual congress, laugh now at rather, uh, seminal pottery, convinced Mom that there's a site where people um, dress up as Smurfs and really like breakfast foods (that lie hurt a lot. The truth would have been a million times worse.) Sadly, curiosity runs strong, and I will frighten myself more and more.

-Never again will I be able to listen to Dead Or Alive's You Spin Me Right Round (Flo Rida's version was always awful.)
-Never shall I be able to look at lemons quite the same
-"Japanese Cuisine" makes me giggle madly
-The goatse mug is really funny and I want one!

And white arrow is a terrible google image search. Stick with goatse. TRUST ME.
Relax... don't do it!

Considering how I feel about mornings...


  1. lol! There's still some people left who really don't know about goatse.

  2. Oh dear. I hope if they're reading this, they see the mug and get an idea. If they google it because of me, bless their hearts, and I am so sorry! :)