Learning to talk isn't so easy when all around you is noisy. I love people- I tend to need to heal inwardly. Over the years, I found ways of communicating, some good, some bad...and still find myself wanting to smack myself in the head when I have to ask, "Where the hell were you, and have we met?" I've also used pantomime, some ASL, my facial expressions, photos, (Sometimes I get silly about it, when a playful mood strikes.) handwritten notes, or black and white notes--- I prefer the hand written because they can show emotions better.
So, hi, my name is Beth. I like Space Invaders, chocolate, have enjoyed Tolkien since I was a wee mite scaring myself with the Hobbit cartoon in the 80's. (You know the one, "Where there's a whip, there's a way")- I enjoy the stars, ocean, manicures, (most recently the Sally Hansen magnetic mani, if only because some nerdy part of me felt like saying, "Magnets, how do they work?", reggae, for its' 60 BPM, like a heartbeat, I calm myself with meditation, at least 20 mins per day, my music tastes are varied- for example, you may find Joan Jett's music,- Cherry Bomb, I Love Rock 'n' Roll, etc. and her cover of the Mary Tyler Moore Show theme, and the original, then suddenly find yourself listening to the Temptations in Italian. I've been a caffeine addict since... God knows how long. I love Dolly Parton. Actually, know what? If you want to know me, ask me.
ST started at 18months. One thing that stands out, and this might be why I suck in my breath when I'm irritable, is the soap bubbles and straw trick. Now, I know to breathe out. Then, I knew that straws were for drinking. Baby Logic. So, I got a mouthful of Dawn. My face must have been hilarious, because that laughter sticks with me. But I caught on and soon realized I could blow bubbles in my drinks for fun. It must be entertaining to sit in a restaurant when Baby is noisily blowing bubbles into her milk or soda.
Well... that's it really. This was... a snap shot, I think. Brain working overtime.
And just because.
Actually: There is someone out there who needs this: You. Be nice to you. Let someone else start doing the giving. You've been hurting yourself far too long.
That's something I never tolerate. I don't like when people hurt themselves- not for any reason. Start smiling... start reaching for the light. It's coming.