I blog gluten-free

Thursday, May 10, 2012

A Man, A Pig, and a Donkey Walk Into a Bar...

There's a scriptural law in Leviticus (The same book that can puzzle numerous literalists as regards eating shellfish and wearing mixed fibers--they don't mean cotton/poly, they mean wool and linen.) that precludes bestiality. Which of course, is a good thing, but led to rather bizarre trials.

The first, which is amusing, but really very awful, is that of a man with a rather unfortunate appearance. Stub-nosed, odd features, bald pate, one-eyed. Think of Billy Barty with a slightly melted face and piggy nose. 
One day, a sow gave birth to some piglets in said unfortunate's neighborhood. One piglet showed as having a curiously messed up little face, and one eye. The man was brought into court immediately, and strenuously denied having known that pig. "I have never had intercourse with that pig!" The court offered him mercy if he'd simply tell the truth. Expecting mercy, the man broke and confessed. Needing two witnesses, Miss Piggy is brought in, and apparently she gave the man a "come hither" look. Both man and pig were executed. But what of the mercy? God was going to have to give the man the promised justice and mercy.

But, in the case of a man caught in flagrante with a donkey, while he too was brought to court, witnesses for the lady donkey insisted that she was a virtuous, hard-working little donkey. She was able to walk out free, but the man who had been caught with her was executed.

It's terrible to laugh, but then, sometimes it's better to laugh at the terrible.

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