Prepping

INCOMIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING!

That said, it looks as though the Eastern seaboard is being hit by Hurricane Sandy. While it isn't time to go and stock up on 100 lbs of dry rice, 50lbs of dry milk (eww, really?) and cases upon cases of bottled water, dried vegetables and fruits (I would however suggest Bare Fruit's bake-dried Fiji apple chips in any type of weather.) I would say:

• Charge your phones
• Have money around in case of emergency
• Stock up on flashlights, extra batteries
• Please know, it's supposed to blow over by Thursday.
• Stock up on any emergency medications- while this is not a zombie invasion, is not weeks upon weeks surviving on dried beans and canned vegetables, it's a safe idea to prep for the unexpected. Make sure your usual medications are well-stocked.
• Those with electric appliances and electric-only hookups may find themselves at loss. While I have 24 hour access to a few fast food places (I grabbed a coffee at McDonald's---not my usual (I'm picky about coffee now)... during a particularly long power outage and needing light and warmth in the freeze... after one of the main lines got struck. This tends to happen.) and can have access to limited food sources there (hot drinks, soda, fruit salad, milk.) in walking distance, some do not. 
• Basic canned foods that can be eaten cold work well... fruits, some soups (if your gag reflex is good), tuna if desperate, or those that can be heated with a little snap. 
• Stock up on your bread, butter, peanut butter, jelly, eggs, milk, coffee, fruit, veggies. Find leftovers you can eat cold if you are in an outage and you have electric stoves/ microwaves

Remember that this is brief... it's a storm that will gust and pour, and pass over. Remember not to isolate yourself and try to keep in touch with family and loved ones. I know if I go silent, I will have people banging on my door. For this reason, I am working on ensuring I send up a flag: "I am fine. I am ok. The only horrid thing is paperwork, and this too shall pass"... and ensuring that I access emergency help if I need it. 

Be safe, but don't let yourself panic. It hurts more, leads to more danger. 

Boogie Shoes and Happy Dances

A "happy dance" is one of those special things. No one need stand in judgment, and no one said you have to do it well. That said... boy, do I need to work on my disco!

Holy Wild Geese

Once upon a time, there was a very brave and very smart knight named Count Emico of the Rheineland. In his day, the Crusades were a big thing, and Emico, tired of simply breaking into priests' houses and killing off refugees, and being greedy, decided he wanted a piece of the action. Off he went with his brave knights, on their way to the Holy Land, to accomplish the task of "ridding the Holy Land of the Jews". (Emico was charming like that.) Well, off he and his men trotted, good Christian knights all. And like all good Christian knights, they were soon visited upon with a miracle. It was no less than a goose filled with the Holy Spirit. Off they trotted after wise Mother Goose, who probably wondered, "What are these idiots in clanking chain mail doing?" in her little goosey brain. She was a smart goose, honk, honk, and she managed to lead our sage heroes to Hungary.

(Now, if Emico leaves the Rheineland at 12:45AM on the 3rd, and heads southeast, and train B leaves Minnetonka... he eventually reaches the holy land... provided he isn't following Mother Goose.) Having gotten sidetracked and led to the north instead, Emico did the smart and logical thing one does when one has embarked on a literal wild goose chase. They had a nice goose dinner. Then they consulted a map... oh... erm... another knight brought him a little she goat that had been filled with the Holy Spirit. So they followed her. Again hopelessly lost, they ate her. 

Sometime later, rather boringly, our heroes, apparently not having absorbed the Holy Spirit with their nutrients, finally reached home. Having never reached the Holy Land. 

And they all lived happily ever after.

Ps. It's the only sane knight that I'm sure was included in the bunch, that has me thinking of a knight actually consulting a map... "Hey, um, I have a map right he--- uh, you ate the goose and the goat... uh, you know what? Map? I didn't say 'map'. Lead on."

Smile!

Bad day?
I almost let myself have a case of the "Brats" today... (In Bethglish, we're talking a "pity party", not a huge box of bratwurst, which I have not had the pleasure of collecting. Darn it.)
But then I remembered... wait a minute... things are looking up. Quit that. The fact that I'm exhausted by--- life being life? The rain? Politics? Oh, pesky, pesky politics... that's enough to knock anyone for a loop.
And besides... there's so many things that kept me smiling...

1)St. Kitsch -for every one of us who ever kept staring back at the Sacred Heart, because you were certain the eyes moved as you did, like those cookoo clock cat things, and besides, showing off your own extremely detailed heart just looks painful. And yeah... there really is no excuse for Barbie Communion Dolls, and some saint's cards will make you go, huh?

2)I did have the special pleasure of getting my hands on a favorite comfort food, Ruby Tuesday's cheddar mashed potatoes. Ok, maybe I am spoiled. Since I can't have bread, I get extra... and they're always kind enough to give me an embarrassment of riches. And to think, it was the beginning of the week and a spur of the moment kind of thing, too. Granted, I do wish I had more to choose from at restaurants. It's still fun to play this game though...there's always a diner, usually, a mother, who needs to know what you're ordering. "I'm not telling you, I'm telling the waitress."

3)Duck diapers. Why? There's something funny to me about ducks, anyway. Add in a duck in a diaper, and it's a small giggle. A duck in a diaper needing a harness? Is something... yeah. I think it stems from an incident at 13 that went like this: "See the beady eyes?"---Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! All I know is, I sure as heck wasn't going to put that feathered tuchus in a diaper. And I still like them. I just think I met one with an attitude.

This goes beyond "something" and becomes "I think the  nice man in the white coat wants to talk about your Daffy fetish."



So, quit looking at the rain and the sogginess, the fact that for two weeks, people are going to be scrambling at each other, while the late fall days leave so much beauty unthought of and untouched, even soggy, the bills will soon be due... 


Time to live and smile!

Nerves

We've lost all ability to speak like humans, it seems. The candidates are debating. The two major parties are there to show us what their candidates are made of, encourage that last minute, still-hanging on swing vote...
or, they're there to encourage grown ups to go at eachother's throats, insist that theirs is the path, and theirs is the savior, that the candidates are shills. Frankly, election time is one of the rare treats that shows the worst in people.

I could encapsulate it, to an extent, but even that is somewhat of a dirty, nasty, trick. Whatever I choose, is my choice, and I'll put that in myself.

But in the mean time, for the next two weeks, it'll be about voodoo dolls, GMOs, padded toilet seats, taxes, lowering and hiking, rewarding banks or not... all at the risk of others' sanity. Everyone's nerves are red and raw. I don't watch even highlights...when I am so disgusted by it all that that's all I can watch... without feeling exhausted and ready to snap.

Politics makes for strange bedfellows, is the most polite thing I can say. The least polite thing I can say reeks of vulgarity. I do know that there is a sort of "working holiday" coming up.. a chance to simply enjoy the sillier, maybe scarier stuff. I think I'll focus on that, work on heading in to the polls clear headed and not with steam in my ears.

Tunnel Vision

If I take all of the advice handed out, I would be frankly, A)going against my own self-preservation B)be very contorted, as I would have managed to somehow do two opposite things at once.

I can't hide from anything in the past. It is what it is. (As much as that is a horrifying and meaningless statement.)
I have to move forward. Herein lies that particular bargain I made with myself. That if I need something done, then I am not going to simply wait, but get it done.

While, perhaps, I have no filter, I am capable of restraining myself to an extent. This is why I prefer to give myself some time to breathe. If I were absolutely not capable, some things I was thinking would have been said in full fury. Among other things, if you tell me I should read the Art of War and The Prince, and apply them to my life (I do hope that the person giving that advice realizes Machiavelli was being sarcastic.), I would hope that you do not do the exact opposite.
I stopped myself before "Be a man," and "Seriously, dude, I'm buying you a binkie for Christmas." But... in this new deal... where, if I know, that it isn't right, it is being worked upon and improved, that isn't sitting, but is, instead, changing for the better, or being dropped if it has to be, the advice to be tougher is good, to an extent. It's also a double-edged sword if you choose to use my "sensitivity", health, etc. as your weapons. I also choose not to become bitter or hard. I won't take the crap life has to offer and say "That is all there is." I will climb the shit mountain.

There are things I am not humanly capable of handling. There are some things that arise by virtue of humanity: anger, worry, fear, whatever. (Do I dare make a long list?)

And no, I won't hold back here: If you are a 39 year old man, you should not be hiding behind your mommy's skirts. If you cannot say "Here is my issue" to the person you have a problem with, while it is small, and actually work on it, while it is small, which I hoped to do... I am trying to kill off the small problems before they are big problems... there is a problem. Talking big and being aggressive won't do you justice when you have that problem. It's a kitten trying to roar.
I'm not necessarily infuriated with anyone--- I'm just saddened that exists! That helps no one. That's no way to live. Do you really want to spend your life as a living embodiment of Freud's specious, and really, rather silly philosophies?

One of Those Days?

Those days... the ones where you're pulled, here, there and everywhere.
Where you slump and get healing sleep, alright, but at what cost?
There is what we are made of, and there is where we come from, and all the ties and pushes, and shoves. When you've got just enough to starve on, and you're at wit's end. When you're being too hard on yourself? Oh, today--- I was at wit's end--- and found out a friend was dealing with the last two... I do the very last quite often, we talk enough that we've gotten to talking ourselves out of that. Or not. For everything to go, all at once, and everything to be a "No". I'm there, friend. The darkened house, the fighting with utilities, the many yards of red tape... I've been in those well-worn shoes. I'm glad someone is helping keep the phones charged, I'm there when needed. I'll celebrate over coffee with you when all is back... because you will get this done! It is tough, it is scary. Doors slammed in your face, "No's"... but you're halfway there, already!


With this song, I say this: just lay back for a bit.