I blog gluten-free

Sunday, February 3, 2013

Questions, Answers, and Waxing Seussical?

I'm going to attempt to be as clear as a bell here.

1)Why discuss epilepsy? On the internet, health issues can be easily translated as something else.
A)The simple answer is: "Silence kills." 
B)The not-so-simple answer? I got a lot of misinformation while searching out answers, and had my system severely screwed up by treatments and stress. All while Inconclusives blared out at me, and I was cracking, because I was trying to hide it- I have yet to figure out how to comfortably discuss it on dates, for example. I know what a lot of things could look like to a jaundiced eye- (You could figuratively be jaded or jaundiced, right?) but I'm doing it for these reasons:
1A-Over the years, numerous misunderstandings arose, from demonic possession, to a personality flaw. We're seen as funny, or stupid.
1B-My own family doesn't always get it, and Lord knows, I try to patiently answer questions.
1C-You get a little tired of reassuring people, "If I feel funky, I will try to excuse myself. You may see me drop things and get frustrated, you may see me tired and obviously not myself. I will usually try to say 'I need to go lay down' or 'I'm going to sit now'." And for some, "I will try to ensure I don't have any symptoms around you. I know it's scary...I've both had and watched...including one child who gave me a black eye during one of theirs."

It is not me. I am me. I am human. I live, love, laugh, lust, swoon over Humphrey Bogart (Yeah, maybe not normal.) I am trying to build a life for myself. I am free, under no one's thumb. I love classic films, kids' films, British comedy, the Mutter Museum site- I almost asked to adopt a criminal's skull as a Christmas gift. (Imagine the hijinks! I'd name him Yurick and do Shakespeare monologues!) I like kids' films with slightly dark overtones. I love my family and friends, music of all sorts, reading, writing, dancing- to a beat only I can hear. I don't fit into molds, I'm stubborn, I'm opinionated, I don't relax easily.

 I am not where I want to be, but I am better-and I am getting better. I am, to borrow from Flinstone vitamin ads: "Ten million strong... and growing!" 

I am me. And no one is me-er than me, or some such. 

I love my butterflies, my cherry blossoms, my orchids and simple little wild flowers too. I love baking, projects, hiking. I love the sweet and simple things, and the sweet and simple people.
I AM! I am not what afflicts me, I am not my battles. I am ME!
And I know, we all visit that Seussical hades, where the hackenkraks howl. But I am not staying, I am not there.

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